HE knows me !

It was one of the initial days to school, I was in 2nd grade, I got up in the morning at 6am as usual or rather was woken up by mom and got ready for school. It was the 1st term exam and had studied well the previous day. I reached school and  looked around, some of them were revising through their notes and others were simply playing around. Finally the bell rang for the exam to start. The teacher entered the class and made us sit in the roll-list order and handed each of us the question paper. I looked into the question paper, it was pretty relieving to see that I knew all the questions and started answering them. Some of the questions which I liked, I spent more time on them and those that I didn't, I wrote what was necessary and moved on carelessly. It was for only one hour and soon the bell rang. The teacher started collecting all the answer sheets and I got up to go home. A few days passed and the teacher one day came and gave our answer sheets. I had scored 85%. It was o.k. I looked into it and wondered that my grade sheet is only going to represent what I write during the exam. It doesn't really evaluate me. I know that the teacher hardly knows me, if I write what she agrees with, then I get marks otherwise I don't. The truth is not known.

I somehow firmly believed even at that time that I am not what the teacher rates me as. All the marks, grading is only for my parents and society. I never gave it more importance that just a showpiece on my cupboard. Even at that age, I knew there has got to be a better rating system, a better teacher, a better learning mechanism. My thinking didn't change anything and I reached college. The same rating system prevailed. I then joined a company for which I worked for a few years. There again, we have reviews, these seemed better because it involved lot talking between the employee and employer, but still it didn't rate me complete. I could project myself as anything I wanted and others would believe me. At least to some extent I could make people believe in what I wanted them to believe in, not in what as is.... I know the previous line is pretty confusing, it is what it is meant to be.

One day I sat thinking about myself, I wondered if I knew myself well in the first place. Well, to some extent I do and to some extent my family members do. I wanted to explore, but I didn't how or where or whom.

Time simply flew and I was living a mundane life.  Then it happened one day, I read the book Sri Sri As I Know Him. It was probably the gut feeling which told me 'He knows'. Then I did the course and met Him, spoke to Him and it was all simply great!. I don't know how He does it, but He communicates more through silence then words. All said and done, I finally found  the one who knows me, the best part is He doesn't evaluate me but only nudges me to move ahead in the right path. He is the only one who has made me realize that I haven't done to my very best, that there is still lots to be done. Not necessarily in terms of money or fame but more in terms of life in its true perspective... 

'Miles to go before I awake' :-)

Nothing to Gain

'Work hard, to live better' is good to some extent, but if this becomes an addiction then we need to apply the brakes. The difference between needs and wants are very clear, but the eyes covered with veil of greediness gets a blurred vision and is unable to find the demarcation. We have come to this world to find ourselves completely, but somehow get caught up with 'others'.
I feel we need to include this region of study of the 'self' in our curriculum right from our school days. Its time we flip through the pages of our ancient study papers and revive our sacred self.

Happiness

If happiness is only to smile and laugh, then many of us are happy!! But what is true happiness? I feel, it has got to do more at the core level. In a way, being totally content is being totally happy, i.e being in total harmony with the nature around and inside. Now, how do we measure happiness? If we observe well, all happy people share a lot, they come into a sphere of 'giving' nature. That seems pretty logical; 'cause only a content person can give!!
But do we have to wait till we reach that state? The answer is 'no'. As Guruji tells 'fake it till you make it' - Sri Sri. I agree to this, because if we look at our miseries, it is our own making to some extent, some of them are even habitual! We have made it a part of us. Its time to break out of them and reveal ourselves to our true nature. The best part is - we are not alone!
When we have our Master with us, why fear? I realized this when I did my Divya Samaj ka Nirman course. I literally came out of my barriers which were created by none other than myself!  If we just answer this simple question - How aware are we of our surroundings? If our answer is 10%, then our world is only that much. Widening it further brings in more variety and more fullness to life. Now, asking the same question in inward direction, i.e how aware are we, of ourselves?  I think this is where the secret lies to happiness, welcome to the happiness program.

Sri Sri tells - "Be happy - it is an order as well as a blessing" :-)

JGD

haves and have nots

If we were to make a list of haves and have nots, we can be sure that the haves list will be longer for anybody!! Though we have lots, we still spend most of our time on what we don't have. Gurudev has often told that, that which is ours will anyway come to us for sure!! Then, why worry?? Easier said than done.... only if our mind would listen to it.
One day I was thinking about this and I was wondering that if everything belongs to God, then it belongs to us also. Since we belong to God and God belongs to us, anything which is God's is also ours! Looking at this logically, the whole world belongs to us, then how can there be a lack? I think the problem comes when we start wishing to possess it, and what we can possess is all small things!! Big things are very big, that it cannot be possessed like the sun, moon, stars!!!!
If we live with the feeling that the divine will provide us with whatever we need at the right time, then we will be able to celebrate a contented life.

Meditation

Meditation as I understand is sitting quietly and being silent both mentally and physically. The experience is varied each time I sit for meditation, infact it is very interesting!! I remember once when I sat for meditation and within seconds I was transported to some other place. This 'some other place' is a nice place, though I don't remember anything about it, but coming out of it feels great. The process of slipping in and out of this place seems simple but doesn't always happen to me. There have been times when I had to sit continuously for one hour, but nothing great happened. Oh yes, for that one hour, others around were very happy as I didn't disturb them during that time.
I read in an article, in artofliving.org that meditating is a source of energy. I wonder why people don't use this source. Almost everywhere people complain about feeling low and lack of enthusiasm, I feel people should start tapping this source as well!


More experiences to share.......

The Goddess

During one of my earlier Advance courses in the international headquarters of the ashram, I was sitting in the satsang looking at the beautiful picture of Goddess Vishalakshi right at the top of the hall. I was thinking of Gurudev of how motherly he is, taking care of everybody with complete love and care. For  a moment I was thinking of how it would have been, had Gurudev been born as a woman, but somehow I could not visualize him as a woman. Then my thoughts drifted to other things in the hall, there were singers getting ready for the bhajans, Gurudev's seat was decorated very nicely, the eager faces of the devotees waiting for Gurudev's arrival.
The 'OM' chanting began and slowly the satsang started with the melodious tunes in praise of Sri Ganesha. Then Gurudev arrived with his charming majestic look and took his seat in the most royal way possible!! The bhajans continued and they were now singing a devi song. Getting immersed in that divine music, my eyes closed by themselves, and I experienced such lightness that cannot be described!. Then suddenly I had a vision of a most beautiful goddess in a red sari with golden border walking down the steps with awesome divine grace. She had so many garlands around her neck that covered most of her face, only her eyes like the blossomed lotus and her nose were seen. As She was walking down looking at me, I was wondering who She is, She gave a look which told that She knows me very well, but I was not sure who she is. I started guessing in my mind of who She could be, the first in my list was Gurudev's sister, the moment I thought about her, the Goddess in front of me rolled Her eyes in such a way, that nobody in this world can even attempt to do except one person!!. That one person is my Gurudev!!, I sat there in wonder and quickly opened my eyes and looked towards Gurudev's seat. He was sitting there calmly looking at me in the most loving way possible. I just sat there stupefied, staring at Him. He gently turned away looking at others. The music faded away and I sat there in all awe and wonder....

Pop Corn!!

Pop corn is my favourite snacks. Whenever I go out for shopping, pop-corn would be there in the shopping list by default. Why I like it? It is so munchy, crunchy, looks like a flower and it is white in colour which is very appealing.
Last week when I went out with my mother for shopping, I spotted a pack of  corn seeds. I thought I'll experiment it for breakfast, mixing with wheat flour and make chappattis!!. So, happily I went home, kept it in the shelf because my experiments are done only on weekends.
So then, saturday arrived and I had totally forgotten about my adventure with corn seeds and had dosa for breakfast!! With the power cut happening two hours per day from 2pm to 4pm, I was forced to do something interesting during that time. Interesting things are usually stored up in the kitchen, so my legs guided me rightly to that place. It didn't take long for me to spot the corn seeds. I picked up the pack and started looking for instructions if any. That is when I saw that what I had bought was "POP CORN SEEDS"!!!!! WoW!! Delighted as ever, I opened up the packet, set the stove up for the preparation. Since it is my favourite snacks, I didn't want to take any chances, I called my mom for help. After little heating up, it started with the first pop, then pop pop pop pop pop pop pop... with each pop I was jumping and clapping my hands( then you can imagine how many times I would have jumped and clapped!!!!). Finally it was all done, mom gave me the bowl, full of pop-corns.
I would have simply started eating it but then suddenly something struck my mind. There was such a striking contrast between the seeds and the popped ones. Essentially every seed has the potential to pop-up but it needs an expert cook. I somehow started relating all of us with the seeds and pop-corns. Gurudev with his love, care and in His own way, chooses a handful(He has a big hand, so it covers the whole earth!!) and expertly guides us and at the right time, each one of us pop-up; blossomed and beautiful, spreading joy and peace all around us.
What a revelation, what a thought given by Gurudev!! My Master.